Nerd Report

You might want to check this out.  I did an interview for The Nerd Report for their first day of Star Trek themed shows.

http://nerdreportradio.com/

Click on Star Trek Week Day 1

Back and Forth

I have to admit that I’m getting tried of the school bus thing.  I don’t like having to come down on students, I feel that parents should be the ones who teach their children respect and courtesy.  And for some reason, I’m having to see the assistant manager again this week.

Now no one likes to have to visit with management TWICE in one week.  And these big companies tend to have the assistant managers do “the dirty work” and are then very overworked.

A couple of times I have been an assistant manager and I never want to do that work again.  Having to “correct” people or finding out what has to happen because an employee may have messed up.  All the while the main manager is talking and hanging out with other people and seems to not be doing anything that is job related.

I had sought out the assistant this morning and the woman, who was looking stressed out anyways, said to come back later.   So I will.  Because I do understand the ways of the manager.

I worked for some great managers in my life and most of those became “work friends”.  You know, the people you hang out at work with but would never go to their house and hang.  But you were able to talk to them about personal problems and get on with work.

I drove home from my morning bus run after being  tagged and started thinking about all the things that could be wrong, that “what did I do now” crap.  Back on Monday  it was just a paperwork thing.   But then I started to focus on Cheryl, the assistant at work.

I remember what it was like to be doing all this work so that I could become the manager at some point.  And I think that it takes a certain type of personality to be a manger.  I am not that. I remember the stress of having to tell an employee that they messed up and not wanting to be the barer of bad news.  I saw that same harried look in her eyes.  She didn’t know why she needed to see me, the paperwork was at her office in the other building.  Why she was having to help with payroll work, I don’t know.  And that is not my place to know, but I then saw in her eyes a look of tiredness and what the job was doing to her.

All I know to do is  treat her the way I would like to be treated. As I focus not on what she needs to see me for, but to just go and hear and be there for HER,  I think I might be able to alleviate and perhaps put a smile on her face and in her heart.

Perhaps it’s the wet, cold weather.  Perhaps it’s the coming out of the “joy to the world” bubble.  But where I work, it’s not hard to see that there are not very many happy people there.

I see a lot of jaded drivers.   I hear tons of things that are “wrong” with the company.   I hear drivers cussing up a storm before a run, and then expect their students not to cuss on the bus.  Smiles seemed to be forced.  Laughter is not heard.  And now I understand why my heart has kinda dropped out of the job.

I just wish everyone would loosen up and love life again.  Understand that you are meant to be a team.   That the needs of the many out weigh the needs of the few or the one.

Part of the reason I would like to leave the job now is all this negativity makes me sad.   I just really wonder what would happen to the world if we would let things just go, that have done nothing but a slight inconvenience.     What if we could walk in the other person’s skin for one moment.  I think people have given up on each other.   We only want what we want for ourselves.  I know I’m guilty of that.   Over the Christmas break something changed in me.  I don’t feel guilty OVER the wanting what I want at the moment.   I understand that you don’t always get what you want.  But you get what you need.

We all need love, every moment of the day.  You can pray to God, you can feel that love, but it’s when you see or feel love from another person, understanding that correction is not about you doing wrong, but about that part of God that is in the other person is loving you and making you aware of that.

I am a good driver.  That I know.  I love to drive, but because of the high costs to the environment and how much it costs for gas, I can’t afford to drive my car just for a lark.   I love the children on the bus, though I wish parents would do more than just put them on.  I can tell those kids who have been nurtured in a way that has made them ready for life and those kids who are acting out like a bad television sitcom and being a stereotype of “troubled” kids.

So here I go, back and forth on what to do.  As for going back and find out why I’m “on the carpet”  I’m not worried about. What ever it is, it is just that, an “it” to find out the “what”.  I don’t know if God has a hand in me being a light to the world or not.   That will always go forth.

I will go back to the school to take the children home and then back home myself.   But I do find that the needs of these children are outweighing my personal grief.

Why am I more concerned with how others feel and how can I help to change the way they are feeling than my own feelings?

Happy New Day

Here’s what’s up:

The world didn’t end last night.  Another has started.

We still don’t understand that God lives within us and that is where to seek the Kingdom of God.

The “ghosts” of 2009 are still with us.

Hope is fleeting when we hold onto the past.

Start today by telling all you see, “I love you”.

And I hope that I can get this blog post about Star Trek V done before day number 364 of this year!

Happy new year all.

A Bold New Direction

Today I took part in a online blog radio show called “The Nerd Report” to talk about Star Trek.   I had the chance to talk about my love for the show and how it has affected my life.  This interview has helped me to understand something that has been missing from this blog: STAR TREK!

Now I’ve had it in my head for awhile to do articles on what I’ve learned about God from Star Trek and will start adding these stories to the blog posts.

Now, not only will I focus on something more positive than the limited vision of Jesus that I write of.

My first post will deal with the “flop” Star Trek V:  The Final Frontier, which really does deal with our search for God.

What I hope to do is show that you can find God WITHOUT having a Bible.  For he is here, right now.

The Change (and it’s not what you think)

Something is really changing about me.  And I think it is for my betterment.   I’ve been getting into the work or Deepak Chopra and have found great truth in his writing.

Every trace of the fundamentalist tones of Christianity have vanished from my soul.  I don’t get this.  The whole “blood sacrifice ” of Jesus I now believe to be a lie.  My views are starting to line up with Thomas Jefferson, and I had never read about his version of the Bible, but find that he had the same notions about Jesus that I came to on my own.

Even my wife has now come to the doubts and the ” making a big to do”  about the Birth of Jesus , his death and resurrection, and are focused on the here and now part of Jesus.  What he did between birth and death.

The Niece Creed is not to be believed anymore as “law”.  It is only facts about what happened to Jesus, not who he was, what he stood for and keeps people from experiencing Him right now.

I have been able to focus on the presence of the living God that now dwels inside, outside and all around me.  I see a beautiful world that is natural.  All the world was created by God, including man, machines, and pollution.  Some of it is beneficial, like machines, and some is not, like pollution.  We need to take care of each other, not with money but with the love that only God and humans can express.

What is evil is knowing that we understand what is good and bad.  God was to be the only one to know that, if you take Genesis literally.  We “died” in our ability to just “be”.

I understand myself better and why I have been changed, not only by God, but by understanding that I am unique and not unique at the same time.

I’m not sure what the end of this will be, but I know that I do feel a bit lighter in the soul, while being a bit bewildered at this change.

Thank you, Father, Creator.

Christmas Tunes

Every year we pull out the Christmas music and we do get sick of some of the “tradition” of Rudolph, Frosty, and The Christmas Song.  I though I might share some of my tradition songs that I could find on YouTube.

When I hear that there is no good modern Christmas songs, I hope that this can bring some joy to the heart.

The Ghosts of Christmas Past Gifts

As I was picking up the family room on my day off,  I was struck with memories of my childhood Christmases and how those toys are no longer with me.

I remembered getting Boba Fett’s  Slave One spaceship , and I got quite a bit of Star Wars toys in the 1980’s and how I ended up, because of needing money, selling those toys so I could keep a roof over my head.  I had so much stuff that I would not play with most of what I had.

What really struck off these memories?   Look at this:

This is my three girl’s toy bins.  I realized that at least 90% of the toys were bought for Christmas.  Some have not been touched for months.  The bins are organized, well at least they have tags on them to tell the kids where each toy goes.   But as I looked at the bins, there are toys that don’t belong in certain bins or came from some other toy that has been long gone, or has missing pieces, such as the puzzles.

What amazes me is that to make our kids happy, we buy them “stuff”.   And then they move on from the toys, unless they become a collector and keep them, onto different, more expensive toys.  This habit started with me, of course, and I grew up in a house where you didn’t throw things away because it might be worth something someday, or could come in handy.   Look at the picture again.  What is really  “handy” about a mess of toys stuffed into cubby holes?  What is necessary about having so many toys that even three kids can’t play with them all every moment of the day?

I used to have a giant VHS movie collection.  Either store bought, taped off the cable or even the dreaded pirated versions of movies.   At least 300 or so.  Each movie was 90 mins. to 3 hours depending on the film.  How did I ever think I was gonna be able to watch all that.  Before the days of recycling VHS, I found a company on line that does recycling VHS and Cassettes,  I had to dump most of my VHS or try to get someone to take it.  Now most places won’t exchange these old things or even take them, because, just like the toys in the picture, they are not new and don’t hold our attention.

We are a nation of over-consumers.  We are loosing  jobs overseas because it is “cheaper” to make it there instead of here.  And the media doesn’t help us either because, like a drug addict, we are addicted to shopping and overspending to show our love.

Last year, the stories of the “patrons” going out on Black Friday, running over each other to get that “bargain” on the “special of the day” and bragging over getting it were numerous.

This year more people are still going out and buying, buying, buying.  Well I am saying  “Bye-Bye” to that.  I have to admit that because of the way I spent and used my credit cards before I got married has put me in a spot.  I can’t spend the way the season demands of me.  I’m happy about that.

Our family has asked Santa Claus this year to give us funds for a summertime family vaction for next year.  We are asking the grandparents and friends that want to give gifts to either contribute to the girl’s college funds or get us gift cards to clothing stores or book stores.  NO TOYS!

That goes for me too.  I have enough movies to enjoy and Netflix is a great service that we pay for so I watch movies.

This is very hard to do and sometimes I feel like I’m a ‘junkie” needing his shopping fix.   Growing up in the 1980’s didn’t help this.  We became  a country of “I’s” and that each person was important to themselves.

This goes against what Jesus taught.  We are to serve each other, not crave material things, though they are good, and to love one another unconditionally.   But that doesn’t happen in our culture too often in a dualistic society.

But what if we can change the tide of getting and start giving ourselves back to each other.   Black Friday has come and gone, and yet again there won’t be a “Merry Christmas” unless we go and shop!   My family will have a Merry Christmas, and it will be without the “trappings” of the season.

Thinking that happiness comes from a store,  that is a lie.

The other night, I sat down at my piano and started to play Christmas songs.  My second daughter, Beth, came over and started singing along.  AND WE HAD FUN DOING IT!

We purchased a $10 dollar tree, who’s money went to a local school’s PTA group, and decorated it all the while HAVING FUN WHILE DOING IT!

There has been no pressure to go and buy gifts, but there has been an ache in my shopping reflex that wants to take over.  But it will not because SHOPPING FOR GIFTS IS NOT FUN!!   At least NOT for me anymore.

Perhaps the ghosts of Christmas Past are fading from memory and the right now, This Christmas, has taken the forefront.  Instead of being jaded about the holiday this year, I will actually enjoy myself.

The most precious gift of all, aside from Jesus’ Way, is the gift of memories of good times with the family and with friends.  Or new friends.

My hope for this season is to be able to invite some of my Twitter friends to a meal, or meet them say at Wiffies Pies in SE Portland.  To be a peacemaker out in the world, instead of keeping the commercialism “healthy” which drives an insane economy.

My hope is that all people will receive the gift of peace and actually open it up and use it this year.   Accept who you are now and let the Spirit of the season change your attitude.  My going without the toys, gifts, and (oh my I can’t believe I’m gonna type this) DVD movies is a great relief and my days are becoming  joyful and joy-filled.

Peace be with You.

The New Kingdom

Jesus was always pushing the law and stretching it out to make the religious set really do what they say they believe.  Well, I’ve been thinking about the whole Kingdom of God and what it means to live in that Kingdom and feel that Jesus may not have gone far enough!

Yes, bold and crazy, just like the Guy who taught me this, through the Gospel accounts.

So I want to purpose that we push the idea of the Kingdom in a more inclusive direction:

Paul has been quoted as saying that in the Kingdom there is “neither Jew or Gentile, male or female, ect. ect. ect….

I say that in the Kingdom there is neither conservative or liberal, gay or straight, child or adult, rich or poor, and that everyone is welcome at the table of God.

Now why would I go and want to screw up America and the world by saying that this is what the Kingdom of God is like?  Because that IS what it is like.

I watched a video of a book signing being done by Sarah Palin.  The interviewer asked questions of her fans, such as “What is Mrs. Palin’s foreign policy?”  And they could not answer.  This disturbed me to the core.  Yet these people want her to run and be the president. Why?  Because they are looking for someone to “save their country”.

Even the fans of Keith Olberman, and the “left wing” are starting to doubt the “heath care reform”.  We continue to fight instead of taking the good ideas of BOTH sides and make it work!  God made both of you, so stop trying to get YOUR way and do things in the way of the one you follow!

I’ve come to understand that America , nations, tribes, etc are a creation of humans and really don’t line up with God’s reality as it is presented in the Bible story.  And yet it IS His reality too.  Dualism is vicious, but only if we let it be.   The truth is that the Bible is NOT GOD, but the story of our way of perceiving Him.

I purpose that the new kingdom of God makes us all wake up to the truth that God is not out do destroy us, have us tear each other down, and that anger becomes love when we understand that we have to LEARN to love each other.

We compromise on God’s love all the time, saying that he will only love us if we love him.  But that is not true!  He still loves even when we screw up.  All he asks of us is to love Him.  But he loves us even when we don’t.

God’s Kingdom is not one built on the power of money, in fact God does not HAVE money. The money is all his to give as he sees fit to do.  Some are better with this tool than others and not everyone who HAS the gift uses it well.  Those that have more than what they can figure out to do with it, need to give it freely and unconditionally to others who ask for it.   At some point we will move beyond using this green paper as means of showing our love to each other, because we will not need it.

I had a conservative friend yesterday ask me if the phrase “Teach a man to fish and he will eat for a life time,” was in the Bible.   It is not.  Neither is “God helps those who help themselves.”   That’s Ben Franklin.  And Ben was a bit of a jerk, just like most of us. Most people would agree that teaching someone a trade will put food on the table, that’s the way our society works right now.But if Jesus were here, right now, I think he would do something so radical that it would shock the entire world.  He would not only teach the person how to fish, he would teach them how to teach others and then he would tell that person “You go and do the same.”

“But what about those who are unwilling to learn a trade?  How about those ‘lazy good for nothings’ that you hear about?”

Good question, but are YOU one of those people?

“Well, no….but I know there are those leaches out there that want MY money.”

But who’s money is it really?

“Well, it’s really God’s if your idea of the Kingdom of God is here.”

Go teach someone else your trade,  but don’t leave them to do the job alone.  In fact, once you have taught your student let him lead as you slowly get out of the business.

What brings about poverty, in my opinion, is that we value what we can own over who we can love.   If you love to have a home, you make sure someone else has a roof over their head.  If you like to eat, you make sure someone else has the same thing you like to eat.  If you like clothes, don’t go for fashion that is over priced, wear simple, durable clothing that will last you and make sure you get some for someone else.

This is not a new idea, but we have become so over-individualized that we can not see the benefit of being together for the greater good known as God.  We have depended on Jesus only for so long and his “return” that we have missed him in the Spirit.  He is in His Kingdom, and he has told us where to find it.  Within yourself.   But the only way to experience the Kingdom is to find it outside of yourself, living out through your fellow human.

So Ready to go back to Work

I’m really wanting to get back to driving the school bus.  When I worked in retail, I really was jealous of those who got the time off during the holiday breaks, but now I wish that we would just take the one day off and everyone get back to work!

Taking a break is good, but I get to bored!  When you don’t have money to spend frivolously, you don’t want to participate in the craziness that is “black Friday” or any of the shopping.  And I used to perpetuate that craziness and I apologize for sucking anyone into that culture.

But today I also don’t want to go back to driving the school bus.  As much as I like the job, I’m feeling that I need to change again.  There is a part of me that is wanting something more than a paycheck and just marking time at the job.  That’s what it feels like anymore, but hey, it’s something to do.

 

I used to like being a homebody, that was until I discovered that the outside world is a lot more fun!   I’m a movie buff and would rather go out to the movies with an audience than watch at home, but yet again, the money is so tight, and the movies not worth paying for, that I’ve just stayed in.  I enjoyed two days this time, the rest, not restful.

I’ve come to understand that I have gone from being a introvert, back when I was a kid in school I was beyond shy, to an overtly extrovert!  So being at home is not a restful place at times.  I like to be on the go and do things.  Even when I get house work done, I’m not sure what to do next.

So the only choice right now is working outside the home, just to feel connected with the world.   At least then I’m moving around.

Reality Check about Thanks

I wanted to share with you an article,Growing Face of Modern Hunger In America that was done about my family’s situation on how we get by on food.   You will want to click on the picture of the little girl to start the video.

 

 

I am thankful that we have a food stamp, or EBT card right now and I thankful that we have a system in place so we can get food.   Yes, we have made many mistakes over the years and have attempted to live outside of our means, but our girls are very ,very smart and self-reliant due to the fact that we chose to sacrifice our financial security to have one parent at home so that they could learn from us.

I’m thankful that my family is not the only ones who have this problem.

I hope you noticed how the food pantry couldn’t even help someone.  Good people who do work are being told to not be human and even have some basics.  Our consumerist society is telling us to get what we want now.

What we need, and are told by Jesus is that we get food , clothing and shelter in the Kingdom of God.

This is what I’m thankful for.  In no way do I consider myself lazy, as some conservative pundits  would like to portray the working poor.  I’m thankful that Jesus says that the poor will always be with you.

So this year, don’t just give money to the homeless and to “those poor working slobs.”    Get to know them.  Go to their homes.  Meet them on the street.  For in this economy, you might end up being one of those who are left out.